Success?

I can only assume, at this point, that whatever The Sainted One was doing for the drummer has worked. My head is, strangely, not throbbing.

Does this mean that she’s ok? That this is over? I’m almost scared to go to sleep to see what will happen.

Scared now!!!!

This can’t be good. Take care of her sentries!

Update? Anyone?

Yo! Peeps! Anyone got an update on BA? She collapse or something cause things just got crazy. And I’m flippin’ awake!

Today’s the Day

Shit. Today’s the day. I’m nervous as hell. I shouldn’t be though. I mean, what’s going to happen? She’s just running an errand. She can take care of herself. She won’t get hurt. He wouldn’t make her do something all that dangerous, would he?

For a brief second this morning, I thought about heading into the city. Then I though maybe, I’d be better off here. That I could help her here in ways that I just couldn’t do in the city. I don’t know. I don’t really know what to do other than just sit and wait.

I hope we don’t have to wait long.

But, while you’re waiting, here’s a pic catherein dropped in my inbox this AM. It’s showing the wall, or part of it, in it’s latest craziness. Well it’s at least her razor sharp memory of the wall in it’s latest craziness. Feel free to talk about it in the comments.

Bridget Oh Bridget

So, yeah, I’ve heard. Have you? The sainted one is coming to New York City! She got new boots! They’re really cool!

It’s been a year! And you got new boots! They’re really cool! oh, and “we should talk” which is girl code for “let me lay a guilt trip on you for being all pissed off” Well why shouldn’t I be? It’s been a fucking year! Ok, so it’s been ten months but it felt like a year! I was here for you. Hell I moved here for you. You knew that and you left “for my own good.”

Fuck that.

But you got new boots! They’re really cool!

Ok, so I do kinda wanna see the new boots.

Maybe one of these days, but not today. Maybe when you’re ready. It’s for your own good.

I need one of those live journal things so I can do a mood: sour and have my face like a lemon because this could rapidly turn into one of those blogs and nobody wants that.

mood:

beep! not that one! this one!

Popped online tonight and saw an email box filled with calls into Nightmare Confessions! Awesome! It took a couple months but finally the site’s being used like I thought it would be. So, just a word out to all you dreamer peeps, if you’ve got anything to add or wanna give a listen to what other folks is saying, head on over to NightmareConfessions.com and then call in! Whatcha waiting for, slacker?

And to the dude that got chased by the beasts… Mammoths! Yes! Those are the beasts that that were back by the ruins. Great description of em. That’s about the only thing that comes close to what they look like. But they’re that close to the road now? This today? And you felt Saint Feline all the way there? She was kinda weak the other day well not like what your talking about. Anyway, glad the slab tip paid off. I’m tellin’ ya, best place to spend the scream and I’m calling it for next year!

MINE!

Yo Yo Yo it’s a Yo Yo…Yo

The sploit man has returned. Not that I went anywhere. I just wasn’t here. Those of you that aren’t worried are pissed. I know. I saw the emails. And the comments. Don’t even talk to me about Nightmare Confessions going down for a couple days. I know! I just got all overwhelmed and the more shit piled up the more I just wanted to hide and then that’s just more shit and more hiding and more shit and more hiding and more shit and more hi! is that a pile of shit I’m sitting on?! Sweet.

Mom gets on my case about how I do better when I’ve got myself a routine and I’m beginning to think she might know what she’s talking about. The last few months. I don’t know. They’ve just been hell and there’s just no fucking escaping it, you know. I mean I’d give anything to just crawl into a bed and sleep for days but, yeah, like that would help. So I’m trying this routine thing and it seems to be working out pretty good. I’m still not right but I’m doing a heck of a lot better. Some might even say I’m back to being me and that’s pretty damn good.

I guess that’s why I stopped posting. I just couldn’t, you know. Two years of this crap just really messes with you. You get to the point where you think of anything and everything that you could possibly do to just make it all go away and some of those ideas are really stupid. I’m not saying that I took any of those ideas seriously but if I’d actually written them down? If I could go back and read weeks or months of archives of that shit? Talk about making a boy feel hopeless.  Who needs that? Seriously.

Anyway.

I am busting out of the City for few days to visit the folks down in Florida. Four fucking days in oldville woulda killed me back in the day. As soon as the last of those early bird dinner plates hit the buffet the town closes down. Rumor is there’s a bar somewhere but shit what’s the point when the chicks are polydent addicts. It’s the anti New York. It’s gonna be awesome. My parents don’t even have a computer. I bet there’s not even a wireless signal for miles. Four glorious days of no headaches.  It is so gonna be worth all the crap they’re gonna give me for ditching the “good” job and chasing some dream in NYC.

I’ve even got a plan for when I’m down there. I mean aside from the turkey and leftover turkey and turkey sandwiches and stuffing and mashed potatoes and green beans and pie and damn I can’t wait for some real food. I’m gonna dig into that map that I’ve been talking about for ages now. I even got myself some printouts! Gotta give a shoutout to Mapmaker and Obtusitivity for those. They’re not right but they ain’t bad. It’s kinda hard for me to like go all birdseye view in some places so don’t know what all is wrong with them but I’ll give it a go.

And now for some comments on some comments…

Thanks for all the messages about the diamond thing. I gotta be honest, I don’t really know what in the heck you’re talking about. Chakras? Mind’s eye? Diamonds? Crowns? Yeah, that all sounds like a bunch of new age mumbo jumbo to me. I mean, I’m not saying that’s bad, but it’s not really my thing.

Dante: I appreciate the slack and the message delivery. I’ve got a question though – what do you mean by CAREFUL DREAMER SACHO? Is that like BEWARE FALLING ROCK? Back when we were kids, we had this one kid convinced there was an Indian named Falling Rock running around scalping people and they put up signs where he’d been seen. Kid was freaked! So, um, yeah, should I be careful of a dreamer named Sacho? Cause, I gotta say I don’t know anyone named Sacho.

Dav: thanks for the heads up on Max. Just listened to the last few messages. Two ewes and an eff. Sounds like I should have been down by the docks. I found myself a good place out by the lake and have been hanging out there when I’m not by the wall. I missed the drums, but word is they could hear em out there echoing off the mountains. Craziness.

RavenWolf: I think I’ve got some of the issues with Nightmare Confessions worked out – let me know if you’ve run into any more problems!

Confess your nightmare

You know you’ve had one and you know you’ll have one tonight. And, seeing as it’s getting harder and harder to keep up with each other at the wall (and I’m too much of a lazy sack to keep posting things folks send in to twodreams), I’ve set up our own little confessional booth that any of us can call in to. I was planning on testing it a bit more, but figured we’d need it tonight. Especially after I saw this.

So, apparently, Ms. I Wanna Kill Myself and Don’t Care That Folks Need Me feels like staying in the mountains tonight. Yes. Tonight. WTF. I swear, if she wasn’t so damn hot.

So, if you survive the damn scream, call in and let us know you’re ok. Confess your nightmares. Whatever. I don’t care. Just call in. Especially if you see Saint Feline.

Feastivus! Feastgiving! Feaster! Feastmas!

‘Tis that time o the year, yes it is!

All the mountain folk are gathering with their bounty o’ crap.

One last hooorah before running for the hills. Err? From the hills.

It’s their day, you say? Screw that! Why should they get all the fun?

I say it’s our day!

So, let’s celebrate the end of this hell of year with one hell of a time!

Caffeine and Candy Corn for everyone!

mmmm caaaandycoooorn

A year of lurking in hell

Yep. I’m coming up on the year mark in just a couple weeks. Hard to believe, that. I didn’t even realize it until tonight when I hooked up with a dude I used to work with. He quit in March before I had any clue what was going on and when I thought I was just obsessed with this game stuck in my head. I was trying to talk him into doing the graphics for me. He was wondering what the fuck ever came of it or if it was just another one of my big plans to take over the game industry that died after I realized it was just the same old bullshit in a different wrapper.

It got me to thinking about everything that’s gone on in the past year. I think I hit on this in the last post, but I’ve gotten myself all wrapped up in the drama. How in the hell that happened is beyond me.

I know this shit ain’t a game but that doesn’t change that I am who I am. I think best and do best when theres a controller in my hands. I’ve always approached my life like it was some sort of crazy RPG. Gotta do the grind. Need more cash. Get more skills. I don’t know what kind of gamer I am, but I obsess and optimize. I figure shit out. I know the levels. I never do the same thing twice cause there’s always a better way.

For the past however many months I’ve been sitting in clan chat bitching that the game sucks ass. That’s not how I play, so why the fuck am I doing it?

It’s time for a plan. It’s time to get back to mapping out the damn level. It’s time to figure out the enemies and prepare for the raid.

It’s time to play the fucking game.